Day 5 & 6: Discovering the Greatest Day of My Life

I grew up in Suburban Chicago which I've always believed to be one of the most aesthetically unpleasing places I've ever seen...much less live. It's not run down, it's not cheap, it's not without great people...but it's uninspired and consists primarily of shopping malls and office "parks" many of which seem deserted.

A cold March storm, 24/7 grey sky and a dumpy hotel certainly did nothing to change the perception. I took advantage of my time here and connected with family and friends that I've neglected for too long. A grand total of about 5 minutes were spent exposed to the elements.

It is hard for me to come back here due to a deeply ingrained repulsion from this place....and it's hard to motivate myself to even photograph it because there is nothing visually stimulating about it.

There was once a bit of inspiring film taken here that I recently discovered. It was a super 8 video my dad took of me on the day I got my driver's license back in 1982. I think that may have been the happiest day of my life. While I suppose I should say it was the day I got married or had my kids...the reality is that there is probably no happier day than the day I gained motorized mobility. Have I mentioned that I love cars? I could have gotten into that car and driven anywhere at any time. Of course I didn't go anywhere (immediately)...but being finally enabled was an indescribable feeling. It was the first step towards escaping Schaumburg, Illinois.

This clip sprang to mind when I arrived at my Dad's home to bid him farewell as I began the next leg of the trip. He's lived here for 30 years now and it looks pretty much the same....

For nothing other than to demonstrate the level of stupidity my father and I are willing to explore I present the great reenactment of the greatest day of my life:

If only I coulda found my Carrera sunglasses to bring it full circle.

Day 4: Marathon Man

One of my favorite movies is “Marathon Man” with one my all-time favorite moments in film. Considering that you’ve probably already seen it…and instead of trying to describe it which will ultimately fail to do it justice please allow me to show it to you in order that i might set the proper mood for this day of my journey:

Now…I’m not going to sit here and tell you that driving mindlessly across the vast expanse of this great country from Denver through Eastern Colorado...

Through Nebraska...

Through Iowa...

Through Illinois (no photo avalable but this one from Iowa should do)...

...while it mercilessly sleeted on me and my icicle laden precious and while the temperature hovered around freezing on a day in which the sky and earth looked like super-creaminated coffee was akin to being tortured by a Nazi war criminal or anything.

Nay...I was being tortured by the collective spirit of all these square-state persons who are pissed at me for living in Los Angeles with access to medical marijuana. I could feel them pointing and glaring as I snugged up with my precious...foot frozen to the throttle. Now everyone is staring at precious wishing to relieve me of the burden...but We swears to protect you precioussss. Sauron's orcs would do anything to get their hands on you precioussss...Yess, wretched we are, precious but WE won't let you go!

Here's the last guy I met before entering Mordor:

Eastern Coloradoan: Is it safe?

Me: Sure…it’s safe why wouldn’t it be? I’m keeping it under 120 MPH today due to the sleet.

Nebraskan: Is it safe?

Me: Ah…no…it’s very dangerous perhaps I should not be out here partaking in "The Good Life" as you have promised upon entry to your lovely state…can I go?

Iowan: Is it safe?

Me: Um…ok…it’s clearly not safe and now i'm hallucinating that i'm on Dancing with the Stars as Belinda Carlisle's professional dance partner and I can only dance slightly better than Piero. I must be a fool for putting myself through this today. I promise I’ll neve drive 14 hours through sleet and Des Moines again.

After about 950 of the 1022 total miles driven today (with Cabaret Voltaire playing for the duration of course) I began to imagine how nice it might be to be sitting in the chair with Szell standing over me.

So…today’s trip was not without it’s amazing moments I must admit. One scene worth sharing…which I have attempted to capture on video but which was nearly impossible to grab on my tiny flip video camera whilst driving was this:

Since it’s hard to see let me just tell you how amazing it was to witness the horizon swarming with migrating birds heading northwest in formation waves. There must have been 10 miles of this with hundreds of waves with what I can only guess included millions upon millions of birds trying to get away too.

The other scene that woke me up a bit was this giant blade from a wind farm being transported on interstate 80. I've only seen wind farms from far away so the real scope of these behemoths became apparent when I passed this oversized load in Iowa. A short time later I came upon the wind farm itself and used this as yet another excuse to go pee pee and photograph my preciousss with something cool in the background.

After arriving in Schaumburg (my Dad's hood in suburban Chicago) around midnight and checking into the "Wyndham Crapola Hotel" I kindly requested my drinking partner to come over to share a celebratory drink. We had a few swigs of the 1942 and proceeded to watch some senior citizen neighbors dance until about 3am. I really wish i had a zoom on this thing to have properly shared this moment with you because it was a capper to a day beyond compare.

I really am starting to lose it here (Seamus---queue up the scene from Marathon Man where he's running for his life)